Originally Posted: 2003-08-14 3:01pm

favorite this post Adorable show dog available to a good home for free

"Rocky" is a 9 yr old purebred Jack Russell Terrier that would be a perfect fit in your family home.

Some of his more endearing qualities include:

  • Sport shitting in the house as a form of revenge when owners leave the house for more than 15 minutes

  • Peeing on people: owners and strangers alike (this "trick" is a lot of fun at the beach or at the company picnic)

  • Getting into trash cans and spreading contents throughout the house (also used as a form of revenge when owners leave the house for more than 15 minutes)

  • Uncontrollable non-stop barking

  • Biting humans whenever possible (he especially likes biting small children)

  • Eating cat food

  • Destruction of property

  • Hiding next to unsuspecting human feet and launching "surprise attacks" as if to say, "you’ve got it coming for standing too close to me"

  • Running away from home and dodging cars in busy intersections

  • Humping legs

  • Taking mouths full of doggie kibble to other rooms in the house to eat and "distribute" behind furniture

  • Whining

  • Extremely smelly farts

  • Jumping on top of furniture and breaking any fragile items that might be in his way

  • Digging multiple deep holes in an otherwise, very well manicured garden

  • Drinking ocean water and then returning it to the world in the form of his own special "ocean blend butt soup" or sandy vomit

  • Click on the link below for more details on this wonderful breed:


    P.S.-This posting is a joke. Unfortunately (for me), my wife would never allow me give away her precious and spoiled, shit-slinging sidekick. I am just using Craigslist as a vehicle for my own form of therapeutic rant. My apologies to anyone who read this and became legitimately concerned for the dog's being well-being. He has a fine and undeserved loving home.

    post id: 14907370