Originally Posted: 2004-05-09 12:27pm

favorite this post I need a URINAL

Short story: I need a urinal.

Long story:

Good News: I just moved in with my girlfriend.
Bad News: There's only one toilet in the house, and it's on the top floor--the only place I could set up my home office was in the basement.

Now, when I'm working, I'm constantly drinking. I usually go through 9 or 10 cans of diet soda a day, plus 3 or 4 cups of coffee to get my day started. (I've been known to drink a couple of bottles of wine during the day as well... teleworking: boon to alcoholics everywhere!). Consequently, I have to piss constantly, at least once every 45 minutes.

But, as I mentioned, the toilet's on the top floor, and I've grown tired of running up two flights of stairs every time I have to empty my bladder. Yes, I know it's good exercise. But I'm lazy.

So I want a urinal. But I don't want a new urinal, with the plumbing and everything--I just want the porcelin urinal attachment with the flush apparatus, but that'll be for show. There's a nasty work sink in the basement, and I figure that I can attach the back of the urinal to the drain with duct tape and some hose. I'm not planning to hook up the flushing mechanism, both because I don't think I can figure it out AND because the water pressure in the house is already terrible--so I'm scared that it'd ruin the other pipes.

Why, you may ask, don't I just piss in the sink? Answer: because I don't particularly want to. Plus, it's a very large sink, and I don't think I'd ever be able to get it clean. Heck, I can't get it clean anyway.

So, I need a urinal. Used is fine, although I'd prefer that it be somewhat clean in the olfactory sense (NO STENCH PLEASE). I don't mind if it's stained in places... if they're interesting stains, I might be willing to pay extra. The urinal should be watertight, and the porcelin shouldn't be too chipped. Price is negotiable.

I'll be willing to pick up, but I need to do so in the morning. My girlfriend will not be terribly enthusiastic about this idea, so I need to have it hooked up before she gets home at night. I figure she's more apt to accept it if it's already there.

Please assist me in my yearning for an exercise-free whiz...

post id: 30754572