Originally Posted: 2002-11-24 9:05pm
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favorite this post Looking to exchange my girlfriend for peace of mind

Don’t get me wrong here. I love my girlfriend, or possibly a better way of putting it is I am infatuated and whipped, but I am about to crack here and tough times call for tough measures. I am looking for somebody to take her off my hands for what I am hoping will be forever in exchange for serenity and peace of mind. Maybe you don’t think you have that to offer in exchange but trust me, you do!

This is open to both men and women because she is bisexual. I have yet to see her hook up with a female but she swears, or possibly threatens she is bisexual. This only seems to come up when we are having issues but all I am saying is she is versatile.

She is also very sexy and I would go as far as saying she is a chameleon and would look good with just about everybody, or at least that is the way she sees it when she thinks I’m not watching her.

Here are some things she excels at and can enrich your life with:

Analyzing what is wrong with you
Spending your money
Microsoft Word
Getting other people’s numbers
Sex deprivation
Getting emotional
DHTML
Depression delegation
Multiple purse management
Sharing herself with others
Blamestorming
Bipolar reasoning
Fit throwing
Adobe Photoshop
Emotional terrorism
Microwave operation
MP3 Encoding

As you can see you will be getting quite a package here and I couldn’t even mention everything while the law suit is still pending. I know there are a lot of lonely men and women out there in the Bay Area and I am hoping to join your ranks quickly but at least one of you will never have to be alone again! (possibly several of you from my experience)

Thanks and I can have her on your porch within the hour.


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