Top Ten Reasons to buy my Durango:
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10) You’ve only got $9500 so you can’t afford a Hummer.
9) You can carry 8 passengers comfortably with the handy, collapsible 3rd row of seating. Watch your popularity skyrocket when your friends need someone to drive to the bars (tinted windows and cup holders in back)
8) Nothing says “F you hippies” like driving a V8 Magnum full size SUV around by yourself.
7) You want to support international terrorism, but donating to Al Queda directly will draw too much attention to your finances. Instead, spend $250 a month on various petroleum products imported from the Middle East.
6) I ask no questions, and have no problem with drug/blood money.
5) If you don't buy it, or at least send this link to 10 friends, you will have bad sex/luck for a year. Plus, with all that money you have coming from that relative who just died in Nigeria, what's $9500???
4) You are a single woman, love mechanics, and need an excuse to meet some.
3) You are a conservative Republican and this comes with free “Bush/Cheney ‘04” / "Don't mess with Texas" stickers. You also can proudly say you’ve bought American and are ensured the peace of mind of owning a quality Chrysler product.
2) 4x4 is twice as good as 2x4. Especially for tearing up nature preserves or plowing through those pesky anti-war/environmental/PETA protestors who make it their job to prevent you from getting to your job.
1) You’re a liberal democrat and rather than waste $9500 on the failing Kerry/Edwards campaign, you want to put your money to good use getting this gas-guzzler off the road. You can burn it at your next peace rally (be sure to use natural lamp oil as an incendiary device and remove tires to prevent harmful black smoke from releasing chemicals into the environment).
Email me if you're interested.