I propose a massive death match tournament Battle Royale. We will randomly pair off the fighters into brackets and have them duke it out for supremacy over the Missed Connections list, Here is the list of contestants that will make their mark forever on the Missed Connection list:
First up, we have none other than the SALSERO FIREMAN. A relitively new entry to the MC list, his all caps innane messages have been driving people nuts.
next up, San FranDisco. This asshole knows how to rile the list up but he has been strangely silent of late.
No MC Battle Royale would be complete without Flaggers. In this contest we have selected two of the largest butted Flaggers on the list. We decided on two because the flaggers all need each other to feel important. The two flaggers will not be matched against each other in the first round but it will be exciting to see what happens if they meet each other in later rounds.
Next up, The Asian Fetishist. Yes, that jerk who doesn't really know any asian women, has just arrived from the mid west and is horny for the "my love you long time" myth propogated in his high school days.
Next up, that white Bitch that hates the Asian Chicks for dating white guys. This woman is merciless, ugly and possibly dangerous, so look out!
Next up, a classic competitor on MC, the loud mouthed, Conservative war supporting whacko. If you've ever listened to AM talk radio, then you know what this guy is gonna say. He can piss you off with the best of them!
Next up, the knee jerk liberal reactionary. This character is the flip side of the coin of the conservative whacko. Both of them hate each other but they don't realize how their extremism make them so identical.
We have two entries coming in to MC from Casual Encounters...
First CE entry to MC, is the "Loving Breast Massage" guy. You love him, he cracks you up and we need more of him in MC.
Our final contestant is the "Treat my mouth like a little pussy" guy from CE. Yes, this gay man loves trying to convince straight men to shoot a load down his throat. A true Craigs list competitor.
Who will live who will die? Stay tuned for the results, only here on Craigs list!