40 y.o. male, impeccable driving record, will drive your car into the ocean. Willing to plunge your car into the Atlantic, if in the NYC area, or into the Pacific, if located in SF or LA.
Additionally, willing to drive cross-country, from NYC to CA, launching your vehicle into the Pacific upon arrival, or, alternatively, from CA to NYC, splashing your car into the Atlantic at time of arrival.
There is no charge for this, less the cost for wetsuit and scuba gear.
Also available to drive your car to Arizona, dumping your car into the Grand Canyon.
I also offer, for a nominal fee ($100), a complete pummeling of your car with a sledge hammer.