Originally Posted: 2007-10-08 12:04am

favorite this post Now with even lower standards! (Portland)

Due to shortages in men in the Greater Portland Area, the following categories of unforgivable lowlifes have been promoted to "potential relationship material" for me:

-Daily pot smokers
-My intellectual inferiors
-Dirty, smelly coffee shop poets
-Possessive types
-Women haters
-Men old enough to be my Dad
-My Dad
-Anyone else in my family, including the remains of my dead grandfather
-People who can't spell and refuse to use spell check
-Negative, angry types
-Politicians/the criminally insane
-Smokers who pretend to be non-smokers
-Vain, self-centered artists
-Drama queens
-Guys who always get dumped and can't figure out why
-The dental-hygienically challenged
-Anyone with that shit-eating fetish
-People who ever liked the band "Book of Love"
-Pig Fuckers
-Pink shirt wearing corporate capitalist dick heads who drive fancy cars
-Free loaders
-Your dumb friend, age 37, who still plays video games after work
-Anyone with a toupee
-The insecure
-Humorless "business" types
-Mama's Boys
-Sex addicts
-Infantile fuckwits who blame everyone else for their problems
-Bad kissers
-The fiscally irresponsible
-Underachieving slacker dudes
-Anyone in any kind of tribute band

Hope to hear from you soon!

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