Disclaimer: I read MC’s with a pathetic frequency, and I have consistently been troubled by some people’s inability to write acceptable missed connections. I know all of these have been said before, but damn it, no one listens. So if everyone could kindly follow my instructions, it would cut down on a good deal of bullshit, which, for all I care, can get relocated to the hopelessly polluted Rants and Raves section. Thank you for your time.
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1. MC’s with inanimate objects, memories, emotions etc., ie, my sanity, good chow mein, someone who shares my affinity for whirly ball. These are not true MC’s and they are never interesting in any manner. Kindly post them elsewhere.
2. Vague as fuck MC’s that aren’t really MC’s, but are lovelorn laments, instead. Ex: A, miss you, love L. Get an anonymous livejournal, you jerk. Trust me, Ashleigh, Antonio, Amit, Ava and Arty don’t want to waste anytime wondering if Larry, Lupi, Lazarus, Luigi, or Lisa is missing them. Every other letter of the alphabet just doesn’t care.
3. Your eyes are like roses, upon my soul’s nose.
Love, Love, so much love, for you, my angel above.
See how shitty poetry is? Post it on your damn livejournal and dedicate it, with love, from L, to A.
4. Dawn J, where are you? Hey, Dawn J! Dawn J! Dawn J!!!! I love you! No. One post, per week, for 2 weeks at most. After that, give it up, you annoying bastard. Dawn J, David from Ghiradelli, the Delilah’s door guy, your grad school prof. have all gotten the message and don’t care, and neither do the rest of us.
5. Brown Hair on the Brown Line! (Chicago)
You had brown hair on the brown line. So did I! Let’s get java!
Please, please put more details, so we can avoid the subsequent 20 posts begging for more specifics. Wait, I have brown hair AND I ride the brown line! Do you mean me? oh please, please, be talking about me!
P.S. I do realize the hypocrisy of posting this in MC’s, yes. I apologize for any inconvenience.