Originally Posted: 2007-09-12 4:45pm

favorite this post Deployment and the Military Wife...a Rant. (Boise)

It became real today. As much as I wanted to believe it wouldn’t happen. It will and in 13 days. I just received my husband’s itinerary. He is leaving for the sandbox for eight months. Now I am sad, mad and if you could indulge me a smidge, there are a few people I would like to rant at right now, before I start freaking crying again. These are the people who mean well, or maybe they don’t. But for damn sure need a lesson in tact. This is a snapshot of the people I have had conversations with over the course of two months after they find out my husband is deploying:

The ME, ME, ME Person:
“Oh, well, you still have me.” Wow! I didn’t realize my husband leaving made this all about you. How lucky I am to still have you! The thing is, there truly are few people I like more than my husband, and simply put, you are not one of them.

The Pragmatist:
“Well, you knew he was in the Military and that this could happen.” Yep, sure did and you also know that your husband has a penis, so should he ever decide to put it inside another woman, please allow me to remind you of this fact. Same thing, don’t you think? After all, you knew he had said penis when you married him? (okay so that is mean, but I REALLY hate this statement.)

Misery Loves Company Person:
These are the other people who say nothing, barely registering what I have just said when they’ve asked how I'm doing. These people truly suck it because they seem to think that the best way to get my mind off of my husband leaving is to tell me about all the HORRIBLE problems they are having in their lives. Either that or they just don’t give a rip. Yes, I can see how tragic it was that your crock pot burnt out during its cook cycle. No, I really have no idea if the chicken was still good enough to eat. Oh, you ate it anyway? Little Timmy got the shits? And the dog too, huh? And it almost ruined the vacation plans you had with your husband? Hey listen, I have to go before I rip off your fucking head and use it to plug up Timmy’s ass…

The Zealots:
If I had a dollar for every time I have been invited to bible study to help me cope, I would have $27.00 after tithe. I am a spiritual person, but reading the bible is not going to help me understand why my DH is being sent away to invest in a seemingly senseless war. Instead of inviting me to a bible study, invite me to the white house. But then again, I won’t get any answers there either…

The thing is, I am sick and tired of all the God wars.

The Freak:
“Aren’t you afraid he is going to cheat on you?” Gee thanks. Is that the best you can come up with? Seriously? I’ll bet you tivo Lifetime for Women, don’t you? There are worse things to fear my tacky friend. Like knocks at the door when you aren’t expecting company and/or a flag folded into a precise triangle.

The Perv’s:
The predators that really think that Military wives will suddenly become sluts before their husband’s plane has even hit the sky. I’m not saying these women do not exist, but I am saying LOUDLY that I am not one of them. Nor am I going to choose a delayed subscription. And how sad is it, that I cannot display my pride in my brave husband (because even though the war is becoming more and more futile, I do support the fight on terror) by displaying a sticker in my living room window? Why? Because I become a target for the disgusting, vile pieces of filth: the degenerates that pray on the military families left alone. Nice huh?

That sort of covers the worst of the lot. I thank you all who have gotten through my rather lengthy rant. I leave you with this: Instead of saying any of the above, just try listening, making eye contact, empathizing. I am not looking for pity nor do I want your sympathy; I just want people to understand how hard this is on a family. So if you see me at the airport crying hysterically clinging to a man in DCU’s, don’t stare, please just go on home and kiss your spouse.

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