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Originally Posted: 2006-01-05 5:57pm

In Order to Make the World a More Beautiful Place...

In order to facilitate a more peaceful CL W4W environment, I propose that we petition “Craig” to initiate subcategories within the CL W4W forum. I submit the following for consideration:

Color Wheel 101
Are you good at mixing colors? Did you take art classes in college? Then “Color Wheel” is the area for you! Debate the veracity of statements such as, “red and blue make purple”, “all colors mixed together make white”, and “blue and orange are complimentary colors”. This forum is open to women who identify as gay, straight, lesbian, dyke, bisexual, omni-sexual, asexual, abstaining by choice, abstaining by circumstance, and all variations of trans individuals.

White Women Who Hate Black Women
Did your granddaddy wear a hood and burn crosses on the neighbor’s lawn? Are you incapable of tactfully stating a dating preference for Caucasian women without using racial slurs or slanderous physical descriptions? Then “White Women Who Hate Black Women” is the forum for you! There is no grammar skill requirement for this forum.

I’m a Pissy Bitch and Have Nothing Better to do Than Find Fault with Everyone Else
Do you have a miserable life? Does someone piss in your Cheerios every single damned day of the week? Do you have TONS AND TONS of spare time on your hands? Then “I’m a Pissy Bitch and Have Nothing Better to do Than Find Fault with Everyone Else” is the forum for you! Peruse the ads in the other forums at the CL W4W board and post away with your litany of criticisms and grammar mistake corrections. This board is particularly appealing to those who know it all and have never actually experienced heartbreak – makes it much easier to make fun of those who seek advice, guidance, and sympathy on the next board.

The Woman I Met Three Weeks Ago Who Swore She Loved Me on Our Second Date Broke Up With Me – Suicide Advice Needed
Do you rent the U-Haul just in ANTICIPATION of the first date? Do you use the word “love” with someone before you’ve memorized the names of their five cats? Have you been told by more than two friends that you really should seek therapy? Then “The Woman I Met Three Weeks Ago Who Swore She Loved Me on Our Second Date Broke Up With Me – Suicide Advice Needed” is the place for you! Commiserate with others who’ve experienced both the thrill of new love and the agony of the end of a relationship within the same calendar week. This is a great forum for meeting that next “special lady”.

I’m a Skank, My Boyfriend’s a Skank, but We Can’t Help but Fantasize
Are you a straight woman with a fantasy? Does your boyfriend have a birthday coming up? Then “I’m a Skank, My Boyfriend’s a Skank, but We Can’t Help But Fantasize” is the place for you! Never mind that the forum is found in the W4W section – that’s just to keep all the REAL straight women and men without goals from wandering in. If you have a boyfriend, but spend your days daydreaming about what it would be like to be with a woman (and, hey, who hasn’t, right?), then step right up, give us your measurements and his “dimensions” and let’s get it on! This forum best suited for those with no respect for their partner, who can host, and own their own digital camera.

I’m Really a Guy…And a Perv…And Since I Don’t Leave My Mom’s Basement, This is the Only Way I Can Possibly Ever Hope to See a Naked Woman
Are you 35+ and still living at home? Do you routinely not bathe for days or weeks at a time? Have your or a close friend had your picture posted on at least one State’s “Sex Offender Web Page”? Then “I’m Really a Guy…And a Perv…And Since I Don’t Leave My Mom’s Basement This is the Only Way I Can Possibly Ever Hope to See a Naked Woman” is the place for you! Don’t worry about grammar and no need to romance your prey. Just shuffle on in, tell us how horny (alternate spellings include: horney, hornee, whoreny) you are, and tell us ALL about how badly you’d like to slurp, lick, finger, and fist us. Be sure to request a naked photo and send us one of your “member” in response.

I’m A Normal Lesbian and Can’t Figure Out How I Ended Up Here
Did you stumble on to CL one day, see the W4W icon, and naively post a well-written and witty personal ad, listing your interests, what you’re looking for in a partner, and asking that interested individuals contact you? Do you possess boundless amounts of optimism and believe that you might truly find an intelligent, interesting, emotionally stable (preferably without the aid of medication), clean and sober, d/d free, single, lesbian or bisexual woman with a sense of humor on CL? Then “I’m a Normal Lesbian and Can’t Figure Out How I Ended Up Here” is the place for you! Practice the great lost art of true communication. Engage in enthralling online conversations with other women possessing similar optimism and naiveté. This forum reserved for women with some degree of class and at least a hint of personality.

I recognize that additional forums may be needed later on, but this should be a good start. If I can get enough support for this movement, I'll start the petition to ol' "Craig" himself and see if we can get W4W moving in the right direction!

post id: 122945896

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