Wanted - Crazy Roommate!
I feel that I must have been doing something wrong, so I'm going to try a new tact: ask for the crazies in the hope that a normal person replies to me.
Here's where you come in.
If any of these apply to you, I want you to be my new roommate!
-Your Facebook photo has you pointing a gun to the camera with a bandana around your neck and wearing a shirt that says "Thug 4 Life"
-You've been evicted from your last three places because your landlords "were all stupid biches"[sic]
-You're hoping to cram yourself, your significant other, and two kids into one room.
-You have enough pets to classify your room as a small zoo.
-You are thinking about moving up to the Seattle area, so can I please hold the room for two months until you can look at it?
-You want the room at half the price with utilities thrown in... with your own private bathroom, entrance, and hopefully kitchen (if it's not too much to ask)
-You feel the need to explain how your ex screwed you over in your introductory e-mail
-You want it to be so 420 friendly that... dude... wait... what?
Don't be bashful! Apply immediately!
You must be able to fail a criminal background check, preferably with at last one felony and be at least a level three sex offender.
Unemployed is preferable but not required. References from previous evictions a plus.
My ideal roommates are pictured above.
To the person who flagged the first post for removal at 3am last night... you're just the type of person I'm looking for! E-mail me and set up a viewing today!
Seriously, though, I must be hitting too close to home, because people keep flagging the ad for removal (as well as many people flagging for "best of Craigslist").
- cats are OK - purrr
- dogs are OK - wooof
- Location: Lynnwood
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests