Originally Posted: 2006-06-05 15:04 (no longer live)
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I love Your Baby and Toddler, BUT....

Oooh! What an adorable child! Those blonde curls are SOOO CUTE! No, don't worry, though there's barely room in this tiny cafe, that double-wide SUV assault stroller will be just fine here. That sure was nice of that couple to open both of the doors on their way out, providing just enough room for that push-golfcart to get in here. People always think its cute that they have to literally shift all of the tables toward the wall so that you can steer the toddler and 8 month old around the corner. Say! Is that a luggage rack below their sise-by-side bucket-seats? Wow! Besides one change of diapers and a box of crayons, think of all the toys and corn-syrup snacks that could be packed in there! Uh-oh, you've just ordered a Venti-Maximo-Mocha-Milka-Frippo... how can you possibly carry- Oh, wow... it has a drink holder built into the dashboard of the thing. Now that's a real life saver. Those two people behind you in line seem to be a bit annoyed that you ran over their toes, and banged one of their shins, but your winning whitened smile and bleached hair won them over, and the first guy left his bike locked to a parking meter, which might be in your way when you leave. The second guy seemed down on his luck, and left a shopping cart full of who-knows-what right outside, as he came in to pay for coffee with change (you had the good sense to use a $20). Thank god that shopping cart and bike were left outside (could you imagine those filthy things in here? Ugh!) Ah, yes! a good idea... you were smart enough to grab a stack of napkins about 2 inches think, just in case the Mocha-mucko got on your capri pants or waist-tied wind-breaker. Alright, you're almost ready to go, the coffee is safely in the drink holder, your sunglasses are poised ontop of your hair, ready to be deployed, all you need now is just to fake a struggle with the door, and some young man will be guilted into fulfilling his duty for the day. Okay, he held the door, now just issue a helpless and surrendered "Thaaaanks" and we're off to the city! Ooh! I know a little pizza place a few blocks away!

post id: 168265652