Originally Posted: 2007-02-16 21:26 (no longer live)
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So Here's The Situation


I am a very attractive Spanish/Canadian woman in my mid-twenties. I have the classic mediterrenean look. I have the face of Catherine Zeta-Jones, tanned complexion and have been told by many that although my breasts are a little bigger than average they are quite nice. I graduated university only recently, and have a decent job.

However, I have a dilemna......as attractive as I am, the biggest problem I have is holding onto a guy. It is not because I have mental problems or anything, I am quite sane, but there is something that I can't control...see...I have bad gas. I blow really enormous farts all the time, and for the most part they stink really badly. This is just my luck, I am a totally attractive woman, but eventually a guy will find out, that I blow big farts on a regular basis, and they stink horribly. There are probably some guys reading this saying how they can get past all of that, but before you e-mail me let me give you some examples of how my farting can compromise things.

Just two weeks ago I was at Schmooze, and I met this cute guy, he bought me drinks, and then next thing I know I am making out with him on the dance floor. He didn't know about my farting problem on the dance floor cause all the cologne and perfume that everyone was wearing I guess masked it. It wasn't until we went to a bathroom stall to makeout that my secret slipped out. There he was one hand on my breast, and the other on my left ass cheek, and I let out this unbelievably loud fart, and he opened his eyes, stepped back, and passed out. My farting can interfere with sex too. I mean think about it, there you are taking me from behind, when all of a sudden, you hear this Tuba-like sound coming out of my ass, and there it is for you, the Chili we had at dinner. Even just sleeping bed could be problematic, there you are trying to fall a sleep, and I am right next to you tooting like there is no tomorrow. My farting has been a problem in my current job. Poor Marilyn, the middle aged woman that sat next to my desk is on extended sick leave. It's a good thing they invented Febreeze, I go through about a bottle a week.

Other than that, I am intelligent, funny, cultured and well travelled. I am a lot fun to be with, and think that I would make a good companion. So if there are any guys that are interested, and can get past my farting problem, or at least are willing to make a genuine attempt, e-mail me...your pic gets mine.

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