Originally Posted: 2007-11-08 16:19

Superstars of San Francisco

Guy who pretends to be blind
Walks around all day with sunglasses and a white tipped cane, but I've seen him at 4am buying dope on Leavenworth and reading a newspaper. I know it is the same person- he wears a really dirty 49ers jacket and pj pants. He is not blind. I don't get it.

Woman with fish
I was walking behind her and I smelled fish. Not necessarily rotting fish, but definitely fish. When we got to the intersection I saw that she had a bunch of whole fish strung around her neck. I want to be classy too.

Toothbrush woman
Today she was sitting outside the Hall of Justice at about 2-2:30 pm brushing her teeth with an electric toothbrush. When I unlocked my bike and walked past I saw that she was dipping the toothbrush into a bottle of nailpolish remover. What the FUCK?!

Teenage girl with boyfriend on a dog leash
On the 30 early in the morning I have twice seen the girl (age 15 or 16) sitting with her boyfriend. Normally I would think "aw, what a nice looking highschool couple" Except that the boyfriend had a red dog collar around his neck, and the girl was holding the end of the chain leash. Does anyone else think this is scary?

Shower puff woman
Homeless woman in north beach with many plastic shower loofahs adorning her hair.

Giant baby carraige fetish
Guy pushing around his lover (?) in a giant baby carraige in soma. The man sitting in the stroller was wearing a diaper. I'm not even joking a little bit. Come on, no one wants to see that.

Man with wrinkled anus tattoo
This guy was shirtless and had what from a distance looked like a huge back piece of a hot chick with a thong on. When we got closer we realized she was spreading her cheeks and her bumhole had been rendered in stunning detail.

Peeface is a name my friend gave to the guy who sleeps outside her building. She and her boyfriend have both seen this fascinating ritual performed: When most people wash their faces they use some sort of cleansing material and water. When this guy wakes up, one of the first things he does is pee in a bottle and then ceremoniously douse his bald head and face in piss. Now you know how it is possible for people to reek so strongly of urine. They bathe in it.

This is a missed connection with things that don't baffle me.

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