I will pay you to cut this albatross from my neck! $10 for you to get this thing outta my garage. Small upright...kinda works...might be great? Don't care. Take it ( and the ten bucks!), and play it. Or, use it to determine how 9mm compares with .45 when your target is behind it. Or, use that giant trebuchet you just built to see a piano's flight characteristics. Are the keys legal ivory?! Maybe. I don't give a sh*t. Get it away from here. Could be the best bonfire you ever had! Make a fishtank out of it! Saw that on tv...