Originally Posted: 2006-06-19 17:13 (no longer live)

Fix my toilet and I'll love you forever **updated**

Two weeks ago my children have managed to plug up the toilet somehow. I have no idea if it's just copious amounts of paper or if there is a foreign object shoved in there. Here is what I have tried:

Drano (yeah, yeah, you're not supposed to put Drano in a toilet)
Rid-X (doesn't work on normal toilets)
Palmalive (supposed to make the clog slide away, yeah, right)
The garden hose (my father's brilliant suggestion)
Rubber glove on hand (no, I cannot feel anything, it must be WAY in there)

I can't afford a plumber but let me just say that the toilet is turning neat shades of green now and I want to puke every time I walk by. The three year old does not understand to stop flushing!

What I have: well, I do get paid in two weeks, but I'll die from gas fumes by then

a fax/copier laser thingie- one year old

world's oldest treadmill

Anyone want to help me before the toilet grows space aliens and they attack us while we're sleeping?!

**updated** To update: I have received tons of advice on how to fix my own toilet. So, I plunged:

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And then I went to Lowe's and bought the snake, which, BTW, is only $7, not fifty like everyone says. Well, that wasn't working.

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Against everyone's recommendations, I decided to yank my toilet up. I unscrewed it, turned off the water, and flipped it over. Poopy leftovers swam happily over my floor.

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Here is the exit of the toilet, known as the toiletbooty, or toiletass, depending on whether my mother said it or not. This is where the poop drops into that big hole in the floor.

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I looked up there and even managed to take a picture:

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And what, you say, is THAT? Well, I know. It's a night light. It used to have fiber optic doohickeys on it but the kids pulled those off long ago. It's about four inches long and the end looks like a flower. Below is a view of the toilet from the side. That thing made it almost all the way out, and now it's wedged at the end, because there is a tight turn or lip or something. I can poke it with a screwdriver (it goes backwards, but that's definitely the wrong way) but my needlenose pliers are too short.

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Can anyone help me get this stupid thing out of my toilet?!!! Otherwise I'm going to have to buy a new one, and I've already informed my six year old that he's being sold to pay for it.

**further update**

A very nice man named Dave came over and rammed a rubber tube through the butt of the toilet to retrieve said night light:

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and now it flushes fabulously. Thanks, Dave.

post id: 173293871