Originally Posted: 2004-08-10 6:47pm
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favorite this post Unhappy Ending For The MASSAGE GUY hide this posting unhide

Prologue: We all know the massage guy. Its hard to miss him since he posts on every category of Craigslist from Activities to Casual Encounters. He stirs up all sorts of trouble by posting his seemingly innocent ads requesting to give ad free massages yet all that deal with him directly tell a different story of his intentions. He will then post countless defenses to his character and intentions not only as himself but as other anonymous and strikingly similar supporters. My favorite was the PHD Psychiatrist that explained it was quite fine to except foot massages from a man with a foot fetish.
So after countless weeks of seeing all the hype, I decided to take action and look into this for myself. Mind you, I am a complete dickhead.

First I tried emailing him a few times as myself to request a massage. Yet, I never got a response. I guess he doesn’t respond to men. So that’s when cutepartygirl96@hotmail.com got involved.

Cute Party Girl:Can I get a massage? How old are you? I am 24, brown
hair, green, eyes, 5'7, 105lbs. Just graduated temple.

Check out the adjectives he uses for a platonic massage
Massage Guy: Hello Emily,
Thank you for responding to my ad and I would love to
set up an appointment for you. Are you woman who
loves the benefits to a great massage? Have been
looking for that and for the extra benefit to? Are you
looking for that total erotic mind, body and spiritual
aspect from massage? If so then please contact me and
let me help you fulfill that desire you have been
searching for. I am a professional massage therapist
who has been practicing for over 10 years. The
massage consists of various modalities such as
swedish, deep tissue, accupressure, trigger point and
sports. All this will done to make your bady relax
but then it is ended with a heightened orgasm at the
end of your massage. All this is done with use of
hands, strokes and compressions. The only one who will
be undressed is yourself and no other reciprocation
will be needed. So if you are looking for an
inexpensive way to relax then email me back. The location
would be were ever you are since I have a portable
table and can come to the comforts of your home. I
look forward to hearing you again and remember SERIOUS
replys only. I like your self do not like to play
Cute Party Girl doesn’t care if he’s a little creepy but wasn’t this on free section maybe he forgot because he posted it everywhere else.

Cute Party Girl: Sounds awesome. But I thought the service was free?
It cost $100. Wasnt this on the free section?

Massage Guy: Hi Again Emily,
I am glad it sounds awesome but I am sorry no it is
not free but it is well worth the price. Hope we can
set work something out?

Cute Party Girl: how about $20 for 60 minutes.

Massage Guy: Hmmmmmmmmm $20 for 60? How about $30 and I will give
you the extra half hour free?

$30 for 90 minutes what a deal!

Cute Party Girl: I'm a 40 minutes from the city? Can you come out to
Limerick? You can hang out and have a few drinks after so that you dont
drive 1.5 hours for a 90 minute massage.

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
Yes I can come out to Limerick, not a problem. When
would you like to set up an appointment?

$30 for a 90 minutes massage plus 90 minutes of driving, How does he make any money?

Cute Party Girl: how about tomorrow at 8pm? I can send you

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
Tomarrow at 8pm would be great. All I need is your
address with Street and zip and I will map quest

Massage Guy:
Hi Emily,
Are we still on for 8?

Cute Party Girl: 111 Sanatoga Rd
Sanatoga PA
Its right off 422. It's easy stick it in mapquest
you'll find it. 8pm right?

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
8pm it is! Your number just incase I get delayed or
lost? See you then!

Cute Party Girl: I dont have a home phone and my cell phone is
disconnected until Saturday. How about you give me your number and if there's a problem I'll call you. But I will be home by 6pm I will be there and its
easy to find... its a huge yellow house, you can't miss it.

Massage Guy: Okay see you at 8pm!

Trip 1: 40 minutes each way. Total driving time = 1 hour 20 minutes
Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
Well unfortunatelyu there is no 111 Sanatoga Rd. I
did find 110 and the guy there told me there was no
111. So was this a complete run around or did I miss
something? Do you want to reschedule?

Cute Party Girl: Oh my god! I am so sorry... it's 11 Sanatoga, I must
have hit an extra one... I waited till 10pm for you but you didnt show up. I was so mad but its my fault. I didnt have your number to call. I am so sorry...By the way my friend asked me your name and I didn’t know it, maybe that’s sketchy? Whats your name? Number?

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
I figured it would be something like that, sorry we
could not get together tonight. Anyways do you want
to reschedule? I am aviable able tonight if you would
like to set up something? If so or if not let me
know? Until then!

Cute Party Girl: Well, I'm home now... but I dont have your number
but if you can get here before 4:30 you can come over, my girlfriend is here though is that allright?

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
I just got your message and it is after 4:30 so I
would not be able to get there. However I did say
that I am available later today or this evening. Let
me know! Talk to you soon!
Out till 4:30? Must have been another late massage?

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
Would you like to do tonight?

Cute Party Girl: Can we reschedule for tonight? Maybe after 10pm? or
is that too late? Looks like your a nightowl like me anyway?

Massage Guy: Yes we can reschedule for 10pm, that would be fine.

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
Are we on for later? If so please give me directions
from 422.

Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
I am going to run an errand but will be back soon. If
you would still like to get together tonight then I do
need directions from 422. Hope to hear from you soon.

I send directions again

Cute Party Girl: What happened? I waited till 1130. Maybe another
Trip 2: 40 minutes each way. Total driving time = 2 hour 40 minutes
Massage Guy: Hi Emily,
I was there around 10pm but I couldnt find 11 Sanatoga or a yellow house. Are you off Fricks Lock Rd? Maybe we can do it later but you need to meet me somewhere besides your house. You can call me on my cell at (555) 555-5555. Until later!

Cute Party Girl: I will be in center city tommorrow night at my g/f
house. Can we meet then? It would be easier for you that way.
My g/f told me that she got a massage on the front and back... I didnt know they did front rubs, she said it was great. Do you know how to do that?

Massage Guy: Hi Em,
10pm tonight would be fine, just email me the address
and I will see you then. As for those areas yes I do
work on them. You are in for a treat.

Notice he’s calling me “Em” now.

Cute Party Girl: Ok, I can't wait. My address is 1620 Chestnut apt 34. So how about happy endings ;-)

Massage Guy: Hi Em,
What about them?

Cute Party Girl: Do they cost extra?

Massage Guy: It is part of the massage. Anyways I am going to be
heading out in a bit so I will see you at 10pm. So it
is 1620 Chestnut St near 17th right. That is what map
quest is saying. If I am late you can call me at
(555) 555-5555 to see where I am just incase I get

Massage Guy: Okay and that is Chestnut St which is near 17th right?

Cute Party Girl: My penis and I cant wait!
I don't think he got this email in time

Cute Party Girl: Where were you? We are waiting?

Trip 3: 15 minutes each way. Total driving time = 2 hour 20 minutes
Massage Guy: Hi Em,
I went to 1620 Chestnut which there is not one. THere
was 1622 which was the Philadelphia school of arts but
no 1620.

Massage Guy: What do you mean penis and I? So are you serious about getting a massage or are you waisting my time?

Cute Party Girl: Waisting your time. Stop posting so much on craigslist. You’ve been wasting my time. Ha ha.

post id: 38987180