Recently my inner child contacted me. No one was more suprised than me. The conversation went a little like this.
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(23:29:46) Inner Child(IC): who is this?
(23:29:56) Me: it's me
(23:29:58) Me: who are you?
(23:30:11) IC: your inner child
(23:30:23) Me: sweet
(23:30:28) Me: i didn't know i had an inner child
(23:30:33) Me: so how have you been?
(23:30:37) IC: pretty good
(23:30:50) IC: been pretty busy lately acutally
(23:31:40) Me: really? what are you up to these days. I imagine my inner child is involved with some sort of music or painting or possibly ballet dancing? Or do you still sit in the dirt and eat worms?
(23:31:53) IC: i eat worms
(23:32:22) Me: dammit, i was hoping my inner child was doing something more productive
(23:32:32) IC: nope, sucks for you
(23:32:48) Me: ugh, perhaps I could hire a new inner child
(23:32:57) IC: too late, i have tenure
(23:42:10) Me: hmm, on ebay there are lots of books and cds about the inner child
(23:42:16) Me: but no one is actually sellign their inner child
(23:42:21) Me: I sense a void waiting to be filled
(23:45:57) Me: no inner childs on craigslist either
(23:46:03) Me: perhaps I should put you up for sale
(23:46:09) IC: haha do it
(23:46:17) IC: ...and i will sue
Quite frankly, he is starting to get annoying. And his threatening to sue me, that is way out of line. So I thought, hey, I might as well make a few bucks on him while getting rid of him.
So if your interested in buying my inner child off me, drop me a line. Is your inner child causing you trouble? Replace him with this one. Maybe you just want two inner childs for some tag-team action. That's fine with me too.
Not only do you get an inner child. Apparently my inner child has a cell phone too. Call him anytime of the day or night. It's a (710) area code though, so hopefully you have free long distance.
I wasn't quite sure how to price this, so I'm just going to accept bids, and whoever is willing to pay the most wins. Have no fear though, I might go into the business of buying and selling inner childs. I really do think it is a void waiting to be filled. So even if you don't get this one, you might get another one.
this is in or around Portland