Originally Posted: 2004-11-17 12:34pm
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favorite this post Shower Head hide this posting unhide

One of the few perks of moving into an old, rundown apartment is that the showerheads aren't typically corrupted by the 'low-flo' craze of the mid 90s. The first shower in my new apartment was like a tropical rain. The showerhead was gigantic. Crystal clear water poured down like a warm waterfall somewhere in Fiji.

Then my knuckleheaded roommate decided it was an eyesore (much like the rest of the apartment) and needed to be replaced with a big, shiny, low flow vegetable steamer. The replacement took place without warning and my tropical sunflower was dumpsered in my absence.

What a jackass.

The luxury of getting in and out of the shower in less than 10 minutes was gone. Instead, I was forced to either stand there like a moron or run in circles and try to get wet. It sucked. I tried to replace my beloved showerhead, but alas, the environmental nuts in California have put the kibosh on stores selling what I needed.

Mornings are a bad time for me and last Monday I found myself on the bathroom floor, yanking this low flow bastard apart. I figured out that there was a restricter plate in it, only allowing a small stream of water through. I brought it to work with me that day and had one of the engineers bore the fucker out with a drill press to about 4X the original size. The rest of the workday was spent muttering "My precious" and laughing maniacally.

At the end of the day I raced home to install my little creation. Pants down, in the shower, water on, here we go. Wow. Have you ever seen footage of riot police blowing a person down the street with a fire hose? Imagine that guy with no police and no street. In a 3' X 6' shower. It hurt a lot. In my pursuit of the Tropical Rain, I have inadvertently converted my harmless showerhead into the Commando 450. (Seinfeld episode #126)

I guess the upside is the shower tiles have been hydro-blasted clean. The downside is coming to work with red skin and a concussion.


this is in or around -sb-

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