I was walking down the sidewalk and you, a very good looking woman from the backside, dropped what appeared to be the Holy Bible, bent to pick it up, and through no fault of my own, I saw your thong...and wow.
I know Jesus spent some time with Mary Magdalene, and likely she wore next to nothing under those sackcloths, but I have to admit, your short skirt and fluorescent pink thong were way sexier, and made me want to get to "know" you, in the Biblical sense, of course.
I'm not Christian, but if we can stick to the basic 10 Commandments and leave the Pope out of it, I think we'll be ok.
Oh, by the way, I was the very tall, tan, curly-haired, non-Christian gentleman walking behind you.