Originally Posted: 2004-11-29 11:24am

favorite this post My Conversation with a 5 Year Old - w4m

This year, in lieu of spending Thanksgiving with my family, I elected to visit friends in my former home of San Diego. This decision was primarily motivated by the goal of eschewing the “when are you going to settle down?” questions which are inevitable at family functions. However, my friends’ newly-adopted 5-year-old son assumed the role of attacking my lifestyle choices. The conversation went as follows:

Josh (the 5-year-old): “Where’s your boy?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Josh: “Where’s your husband?”

Me: “I don’t have a husband.”

Josh: “You need to get one.”

Me: “Really? How long do I have?”

Josh: “Six”

Me: “Six what?”

Josh: “Umm, six days, I think.”

Me: “Wow. That’s awfully fast. What do you think about six years?”

Josh: “No, six days. I have to go to school now.”

End conversation.

I relay this to my friend, who probes Josh for more details. Therefore, if you meet the below criteria, please advise immediately. Apparently I have T minus 6 days to find this husband.

Name: Derek
Hair Color: Red
Height: Tall, like Spiderman
Weight: Skinny
Pets: Goldfish and hamster
Status: Married 13 times
# of Children: 3
age: 7, 8, 9 (which I gathered to mean 24)
Hobbies: likes to bicycle
Distinguishing features: Small Adam’s apple

this is in or around Chicago

post id: 50525942

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