The blonde woman with at least 2 tattoos, one on your lower back and one on your stomach. You allowed your boyfriend to use his cell phone camera to take many seductive photos and videos of you and him engaged in various sex acts. How did he get you to pose naked with the new rims he bought for his civic? I'm willing to bet that when he showed his buddies those pictures, this enraged you enough to smash his cell phone on the ground, shattering it to pieces.
Me:
The one who found the smashed cell phone near Armitage and Western and picked up the flash card full of images and videos.
Don't worry baby, I'll treat you right. I don't even own a cell phone.