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Please be patient with me. I knew there were plenty of men out there needing assfucking, but I had no idea that there was such a dirth of female assfuckers like myself. As such the response has been delightfully voluminous—much like the monsterous cumloads you all claim to deliver. I am afraid that I can’t respond to each of you personally, nor can I fuck you all. There isn’t enough Crisco in all of Central Texas to make that happen. I have a life to lead, assfucking is intensely personal and thus takes time, and furthermore I like to be quite sanitary with the whole process; this also takes time. So I plan to follow up with only a handful of you.
I do want to address some of your questions and discuss some of my concerns though. If you are planning to reply to my post, or already have and have not been notified that you are a winner, this may provide you with some guidance as well.
1) I am a real female. I understand why many of you are doubtful. It seems that many gay men respond to m4w posts. As an avid fag hag, I apologize on behalf of the gay community. As a feminist, I do not feel too sorry for you. Though objectification on any level is to be abhorred, when a man lusts after you and you find you cannot control this, you have simply been put in the place that women can rarely escape from. Anyhow, I am a girl.
2) First-timers: Congratulations on choosing adventure. Some of you sound so sweet and I may be contacting you, but beware—penetration (in any form) is not something to rush into. It will be many weeks into the future before I assfuck you. Though you may have rammed your reportedly “huge” and “cut” cock into your prom date’s previously unpenetrated pussy after a few brief minutes of fingering, I do not plan to do the same to you. Most any woman will tell you that it hurt to lose her virginity, but if we would all start doing this right, that would not be the case. Here’s the plan, ass virgins: If you have not done so yet, start playing with your own asshole. External, then internally. Make sure to use plenty of thick lubricant. Take your time and don’t do anything that hurts. It will stretch eventually. When you can get two of your own fingers in there, we are ready to play together. I will be using a variety of smaller toys before we venture into assfucking with a strap-on. I simply will not cause you any pain. (Should you find yourself in the position to devirginize someone’s orifice, vaginal or anal, please follow this or a similar plan.)
3) Queer tendencies: This is delicate, but I got the feeling that a few of you were trying to run from something. To be clear, anal stimulation is not a queer act. Our society frequently associates the two, but in truth many straight couples engage in ass play and there are many gay couples that do not. So as most of my responders seem to know, ass play doesn’t make you gay. But if you have been thinking about having a man fuck you in the ass, then having little ole me do it, probably won’t satisfy you. So before you become entangled with me, you must decide if you are interested in men, or having a short girl with a tall strap on fuck you.
4) Penis pictures and descriptions: Why? Your penis is of no concern to me in this endeavor. Face pix are nice because I have some idea who I am talking to, but I am not about to be impressed by your 8 inch cock, your hook- shaped cock, your cut cock, or what I can only hope was a semi-flaccid cock dangling out of your pants. Its not out of the question, but I mentioned nothing about you fucking me, so let’s let your phallus be a surprise.
5) Submissives looking for a Dom: I should probably tell you why I like assfucking men. It’s the equality of the whole thing. I get to be the subject and you are the object. What men do to me, I get to do back for a change. I think it’s a terrific learning experience for all involved, not to mention a great time. I think it’s a shame that so many men ignore this important erogenous zone. I am not, however, on a control trip. I like for all of my endeavors to be based on partnership. I think you will find that I will fuck you with more care than you have ever fucked a woman with (though perhaps you are all wonderfully caring lovers yourself). I will fuck you nice and easy, and if I speed up its only for the sake of friction, and not to make you feel like my bitch. So if you are looking for someone to make you feel like you did when mama spanked you, don’t look here.
6) Use some caution boys! Many of you have sent me work emails, your unblurred face, last names, and phone numbers. Don’t you want to make sure I’m not crazy first? I mean…I’m going to sign this Annie, but that’s not my real name.