The Washington Metro Presents: Real Men of Genius
(Real Men of Genius)

Today we salute you, Mr. Arm Shoved Through Metro Door Commuter.
(Mr. Arm Shoved Through Metro Door Commuter)

Without your unwavering commitment to board a train that comes every four minutes, fellow commuters would have to arrive at their jobs on time.
(no one hopes you make it)

Armed with nothing more than an Express, you squirm furiously, undeterred by the total loss of circulation in your right arm.
(your fingers are turning red)

Please stand clear of the doors? I think not. While others may heed these warnings, you dare to push the envelope, and all others within five feet of the doorway.
(no one else matters)

So crack open an ice cold beer, oh gatekeeper of the Green Line, because Metro may Open Doors but you keep 'em that way.
(Mr. Arm Shoved Through Metro Door Commuter) by Sneaky