best of craigslist > vancouver, BC > Re: Necrophilia
Originally Posted: 2006-07-14 10:21pm

Re: Necrophilia

Your neighbor is a necrophiliac? Do you know how hard it is to be a necrophiliac? I mean... first off... you have to want to fuck dead people, that in it's own right is fucked up right? So next, you have to FIND a dead person. I mean honestly here man, it's not like there's just cadavers laying around in random environments ripe (rotten?) for the plucking you know?

So say you DO find a dead person, and you're totally feeling their... vibe?... then you have to find an environment where you can continuously have 'THE SEX' with this dead hottie (coldy?) and mask the odour. Believe you me my friend, there's gonna be some ranky ass stench, right? Which is hillarious considering guys are like "damn, wash the coochie bitch..." and then they're totally vibing off the most rotten coochie out there... ok, back to the point.

So the most famous case of necrophilia was this dude who's wife kicked it right... and then he totally stuffed her (i mean, not physically... well that came later... i mean quite literally fucking stuffed her with some shit to prevent the whole... you know.. decaying thing) after he stuffed her he would do her man... and then he kept her refrigerated, well.. frozen i guess.. and dude would thaw her out for a good ... time.

So anyway, unless this person you know... WORKS in like... a mortuary or something, it makes for some pretty awkward steps to get to the whole... banging dead people thing.

Now here's one for ya... i've DISECTED cadavers... and i gotta tell ya, i wasn't feeling it... Now, i'm a chick mind you, and would need a stiff one... but for some reason the stiff just wasn't stiff enough ya know?

Fucking dead people is highly overrated and not nearly as easy as it sounds.

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