Originally Posted: 2002-10-17 15:44 (no longer live)
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The "It's Not Rocket Science" Guide to Casual Encounters - m4w

Yes, guys can meet someone via casual encounters. Guys can even meet someone for genuine no-string-attached hookups... but let's face it, the ratio is badly skewed, and you need to learn how to work the system. If there's one key, it's _polite, respectful persistence._

1) Whether posting your ad or replying, use proper standard English grammar and spelling, unless you're SURE you should be using some other dialect, and in that case, make sure your grammar and spelling is correct for that dialect.

2) Don't just be lazy and post "I wanna get laid" or reply with a similar one-liner. Put some thought into your replies, and if you can't figure out something more to say, ask whether you really should be replying. Which is not to say a short response, is necessarily a bad thing -- just make sure it's the /right/ short response for that particular message.

3) Keep trying. This particular guy has had a lot of coffee dates with women he's met on CL, most of them on CE rather than W4M or M4W. A small handful have turned into intimate relationships of one sort of another.

4) If a woman says no, she means no, and don't get bothered by it. A woman I know has a saying "men are like busses... another one comes along every ten minutes" and while the schedule for women may be a little slower, the basic rule still applies.

5) Unless she specifically asks for it, don't send a picture of any body part normally covered by clothing -- if you're really in shape /and/ it's not out of place for you to go without a shirt, you can probably go for showing off the sixpack but how many of us here does that apply to?

6) Unless she has a clear indication in her ad (or her reply to your ad) that she wants you to make sexual suggestions in your first message, don't be sexually explicit. Yes, yhis is /Casual Encounters/ and most of us know why most of us are here, but there's a time and place for that... and for most women, it's once you've gotten to know each other a little. (The key here, again, is ACTUALLY READ WHAT SHE WROTE...)

Oh... to make this an ad, not /just/ discussion... WM, 27, 5'9, brown/hazel... looking for new friends, with or without benefits.


post id: 6293302