Originally Posted: 2003-07-08 10:05am

Things to do while on MUNI

1. Cut your nails.
2. If you have time, cut your toenails.
3. Talk loudly (to yourself or to your rockstar friends), let the whole bus know you have a hangover and you were gigging with your band all day. (Repeat many times.)
4. Burp loudly, especially in the back of someoneís head
5. Fart loudly, especially if youíre standing and your butt is facing someoneís head
6. Sneeze all over the place, especially in the back of someoneís head, or just wipe it on the railing.
7. Cough, especially in the back of someoneís head, and donít cover your mouth.
8. If youíre an entitled princess on the 1, 3, 4, or 41, cross your legs so they stick out in the aisle.
9. Take a dry bath with Baby Wipes. Moist towelettes will do, if youíre out of Baby Wipes.
10. For the ladies, dry shave your legs with a disposable razor (a la Pecker).
11. For the wannabe ladies, dry shave your legs with a disposable razor (a la Pecker).
12. Pick your nose.
13. Pick your butt.
14. Scratch at your armpit(s).
15. Hawk a loogie out the window.
16. Throw your household garbage out the window.
17. Throw anything out the window.
18. Stick your head out the window.
19. Try to stick your feet out the window.
20. Take up as many seats as you can.
21. Lay down on as many seats as you can.
22. Eat your breakfast.
23. Eat your lunch.
24. Eat your dinner.
25. Eat someone elseís food (left on the seat).
26. Drink beer.
27. Drink someone elseís beer (left on the seat).
28. If youíre on the 14 or 49, carve or write in black marker your initials, gang name, phone number, loved oneís name, enemyís name, address, where youíll be on a certain date, or just make up your own words and write (scrawl) something really ineligible.
29. Air out your feet.
30. Take your hat off, which hasnít been removed in weeks, and air out your hair.
31. Comb your hair.
32. Comb someone elseís hair.
33. Put rollers in your hair.
34. Put rollers in someone elseís hair.
35. Use your portable curling iron.
36. Apply make-up.
37. Wax your legs.
38. Wax your bikini area.
39. Wax your armpits.
40. Wax your moustache.
41. Prep the eveningís meal (shuck corn, dice carrots, etc.)
42. Change your babyís diaper.
43. Hold family meetings.
44. Argue with your family members.
45. Throw things at your family members.
46. Throw things at people who are not your family members.
47. Walk up and down the aisle like your hot shit.

post id: 13301201

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