Previously on Craig's List.....
OK, so it's been like over a week so I thought I'd drop a little update on my fellow craigslisters.
I've been working on propaganda with the gnomes... or so they tell me. I've overheard my name mentioned in their conversations along with talks of "pay pal", "web cam" and "$3.99 a minute"... I guess I'll be doing more fundraising for them too. They make me feel so dirty and cheap, but, if it's for the greater good of the revolution I must give my all.
I so need to get this stuff out of here. More room means more gnomes. More gnomes means a greater resistance. we shall rise up and conquer!
A great gnome once said... " Furniture is the path to the dark side.... Furniture leads to anger.... anger leads to hate..... And hate leads to suffering."
|4 lighthouse place mats, baby blue with whimsical pastel lighthouses. These were a gift for Martha Stewart, but when her guards found the shabby-chic shank that we made from terra cotta, raffia ribbon and hot glue that was included, the package was sent back.||
PENDING Martha's RELEASE
I guess word got back to the big house that i was trying to get rid of these. Apparently Martha traded two packs of smokes and some "un-named" favors to some gals in The Sisterhood for the return of these place mats.
I'd rather not have my head turned into a festive centerpiece...
|1 large orange vinyl davenport (see faq), great shape for being over 40 years old... a little armor all and this thing is good to go... 6 feet of slip and slide fun.||still here... damn i hope soccer mom shows back up... but if the davenport is gone when she returns i may have to take her in my arms and console her... not a bad deal.|
|1 overstuffed chair, a tiny rip on the back that's hardly noticeable. It's really nice light browns||GONE!...the
gnomes were back!
viva la furniture revalucion
|1 old hi-fi, record player / 8 track & tuner. It's not the prettiest thing but it sounds great.||GONE!...To my friend that just picked this beauty up... Keep on rocking in the free world little brother!|
|1 old dresser, can you say Emo? Your trucker hat and tiny black t-shirts will feel right at home. Or you can paint it and it'll feel right at home whoever you are.||GONE!... adopted - making some AFI fan very happy|
|1 armoire, 6 feet tall. Heavy. Needs to have the door fixed. Not bad for the price of 8 screws and some glue.||GONE!...liberated - an army of gnomes appeared and carried it away|
|2 bags of clothes, guys & gals mixed. Good condition. If you don't like, make them into shop rags.||
GONE!...La ropa no allí
|1 brass chandelier to ... we took it down when we realized it was too "bling-bling" for our crib... 5 light with frosted globes||No Longer Here... and yes Ms. Dertilginson, that thing looks like a golden anchor dangling precariously from the bumper of your '72 Cadillac Seville|
|1 "L" shaped "keep the baby from rolling off the bed" thing... made by safety first i think, good condition.||works on babies, not on husbands... come and get it.|
|1 bag - Costco size - mostly full, 8 - 12 cup basket coffee filters... we got a new coffee maker, the kind that takes the expensive triangle filters, so, these are pretty useless to me.||
yet another propaganda tool... the gnomes wasted all my damn printer ink running these things through and printing their revolution logo on each one. they want you to believe that these coffee filters are some sort of some sort of super-eco-earth friendly-organic shower cap... yeah right! they're just trying to cover the fact that printer ink isn't the flavor that put starbucks on the map.
|several boxes - constructed of corrugated cardboard these cubes of wonder come in various shapes and sizes. as an extra feature some of them have pictures on the outside of things that we own. i also may be able to scrounge up some foam peanuts and bubble wrap as well.||because of the value of these beauties, arrangements must be made prior to picking these up. please put "boxes" in the subject line of your correspondence for easier identification.|
|what's a davenport?||Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary says: a
large upholstered sofa often convertible into a bed...
(*)this one has no bed
|i live in Portland, can i come get the Hi-Fi after i get off work at 10 tonight?||sure, but if it's not here, you and
your '71 VW bus just went on a 6 hour polluting spree.
however... for a fee, i'll put it back in my garage and even help you load it at 1 in the morning.
|what happened to the soccer mom?||as each minute passes my heart breaks a little more...i pray that she's doing well.|
|Army of gnomes?||yes and possibly a pixie or two. they said they were recruiting, i can send you a link to their site.|
|gnome revolution?||yes revolution... they're in some sort of
fundraising mode at this point to support covert operations. i asked
"why not a bake sale"? their leader told me their current business
strategy; it went something like this:
Yeah, i don't get it either....
|i showed up at your place and some hippie was taking the chandelier... what do i do?||i did say first come... plain and simple
you could try and take the chandelier away from him... but something tells me that once he gets his hands on his new "precious", passive thought will cease to exist.
|tell me more about the boxes...||let's see:
some are older, some are newer some are bigger & some are smaller some are strong and some lack a little bit but would work for lighter stuff there are more than ten but less than a hundred there are no wardrobe size boxes & no small jewelry size boxes there are no boxes made of wood or animal by-products these boxes do not discriminate and neither should you.
|why didn't you e-mail me back?||well: my e-mail has been on the fritz, but it's free so i can't complain too much. there's also been an overwhelming response to my posting. something like 200 e-mails as of this morning. hotmail keeps being a pain and the way things are going it'll take hours to respond. The stuff is in the driveway...come and get it!|
|dude, it's raining...||dude, it's Washington....look under the big blue tarp. no the tarp isn't up for grabs. please cover everything back up before you leave.|
|You're cool and sound kinda sexy, can we hang out?||men: no
ladies: on the WWW I have found that the CE board here on CL is the best place to find NSA encounters. Please understand that i am a married man and whatever was discussed would have to include & be approved by my better half. please be HWP & D/D free; send a pic, stats and a SASE for the quickest reply.
|For Brad J. who wrote
"but if you do have any meth let me know, my dealer moved to Florida. lush."
|Dude, be strong.... Just Say No!|
|are you gonna get rid of any more stuff?||there are no rules to fight club.....|
Yes, it's 2:30 in the morning and I'm up cleaning the garage. No, I'm not tweaking - just getting some of the clutter out.
I'll save stuff for cash, otherwise it's on a first come basis.....
Please respect my stuff and don't steal my hose, trashcans, car, roof, etc.
Here it is; up for grabs in our driveway in Bothell:
this is in or around BoThElL