Ten Commandments for Driving the Bus
2. Thou shalt not drive extra slowly so as to miss the opportune green lights. This be known as 'blowing the light' and it be a sin.
3. Thou shalt not ignore profanity on thine bus. Lo, though it be at the back of thine bus, thou shalt take action against those that offend thy passengers. This shall be writ to include those that speaketh too loudly, those that profane and those that play their music unrepentantly.
4. Thou shalt apolgize for being late upon having thine attention called to it. Though the traffic may be mighty, your passengers have been waiting in God's own elements for thou. A blanketh stare willst not cut it.
5. Thou shalt pay attention when one of thine potential passengers beateth on the side of thine bus. Upon such an effort the thing to perform is a 'stop' and a 'door open' if thy art still upon the bus stop.
6. Thou shalt not bear false witness to thy passengers by directing their path in the wrong direction. If thou dost not know, thou must say, "I dost not know."
7. Thou shalt not be early, neither in heaven nor hell. This shall be thy great sin.
8. Thou shalt not be surly with thy friendly passengers. Friendliness is next to Godliness and thou shalt drive thine vehicle with alacrity. Lo, if thou art having a badish time thou art allowed to respondeth in monosyllabic utterances but thou must not be churlish, surly, crabby, cranky or otherwise rude to those that employ thee, union member or no.
9. Thou shalt use thine microphone with a modest hand. If thou feels that thine passengers respondeth willingly thou mayest continue. If thy passengers be not accepting of the microphone thou shalt cease and desist until another time.
10. Long may your days be on this earth and plentiful be your dollars and happiness. In the name of the Metro, and of the Sound Transit, Amen.
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