Originally Posted: 2005-01-29 4:39am
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How I become bisexual (Homophobes - don't click here)
It's a shame that lots of people don't understand
bisexuality or homosexuality. I'm not a homosexual, I
love women and always will. I just happened to be a
very sexual, so much that there are other "things" can
turn me on. Simply put - I am bisexual.
Speaking of bisexuality, it is a fine feeling. I said -
"it's a shame...", because many people don't even know
what are they missing. Everybody enjoys variety. Every
man can tell you that they are enjoy having sex
different ways. But for me, bisexuality is just another
variety. I understand a little of psychology, so I can
tell you that only people with a high sex-drive can
experience and become bisexual. There's nothing
abnormal with that. It is just unusual for our society,
that's why we have different opinion on that. That's
why I can't admit to my friends and I simply enjoy it
privately, but like I said it's perfectly fine.
There's all bunch of crap going on in the media about
homosexuality, that there is some sort of chemical
imbalance... Bull shet!!! It is a normal feeling to
experience sexual enjoyment with a partner of your own
sex. It's just when you have some sort of problems in
getting alone with people of opposite sex, because of
your stupidity, shame or other problems - that's when
you become homosexual. Simply because it's easier to
get alone with a person of your own sex. Of course,
there are cases when amount of certain hormones of the
opposite sex in your body is very high, so you are a
man, but look like a woman and act like one, and vice-
versa - that's the other case. That is the mother
nature has got involved. But it is very small amount
among all homosexuals.
Again, I'm not a homosexual, I just feel sorry for many
of them, because they are missing of great feeling of
sex with opposite sex. At the same time, I feel sorry
for all heterosexuals, who are missing of a unique
experience in their sex life.
Let me tell you how I become an "open-minded". It's all
started when my girlfriend had give me a pleasure that
I never experienced before. She licked my ass. That's
all. I was on top of her and I was very busy with
kissing her bottom, when she did that. I've got to tell
you, it was so pleasurable that I ejaculated just
because of that. Of course, I was very exited, I was on
top of her 69, I was kissing a person who I loved, my
penis and stomach had touched her fine body and
breasts, and when she licked me, it was just an "end of
the world" at the moment. So I was done.
For the first time in my life I ejaculated without
doing anything with my "tool" (other than being
squeezed between our stomacks). It wasn't inside of her
and no one even touched it. Wow! I didn't know that was
possible at all.
Later, we repeated the same, a few times. I always
loved it. But one time, I just started to analyse these
things. How come I loved it so much? Well, the answer
was simple. Because there are lots of erogenous zones
around the anus. That's why I loved it. It's not
because I was gay or didn't have any women around.
There is medical explanation for this kind of pleasure,
and I was experiencing it.
So that's when I realized that I've got some other part
of my body, that can gives me a sexual pleasure,
besides my penis. I wasn't even thinking about
bisexuality. I just enjoyed what she had given to me.
And she loved me too. She saw that there's something
she has done, that no one else had done to me before.
She felt and saw my cumming when she was kissing me.
She felt good about herself, because she could satisfy
me like no one else. When she saw that I could cum in
40 seconds, instead of our usual 50 minutes per act,
she felt morally satisfied. It made her feel like she
is better than every other girl, I've had before. It
made her feel special!!!
She was right! She was special and I really loved her.
So she continued to entertain me this way. To explore
other possibilities, one time she started to inserting
her finger inside of me. She realized, that if I enjoy
her tongue "almost" inside of me, I may enjoy her
finger as well. And she was right. I was kissing a
person I love, and my lovely girlfriend was kissing me
and as a part of entertainment, when she was touching
all over me, she slightly inserted her finger inside of
me. Just a little.
You know what? It felt good. I wasn't thinking about
other man, I wasn't thinking that she was kind of
f**king me, but I know it felt good, and I liked it.
It was just the next day, when I started to analyze
what just happened, I realized that I enjoyed of
something inside of me. I wasn't thinking about having
a man inside of me, but I did enjoyed her finger.
It took a little time before I made a research and
realized that male's anus has lots of erogenous zones,
that gives a great pleasure when it stretched. It is
in our anatomy. Every man has potential capability to
enjoying this. Unfortunately not every man tries.
Now, it's just a common sense to realize that if I
enjoy something inside of me, it should be normal to accept
another male's part of body.
But that's not all.
...We where apart for a few months. I was out of town.
When I called her, I told her that it is been awhile,
and for our young bodies it's normal for wanting a
sex, since there's not enough at the moment. I didn't
wanted her to cheat on me, and I didn't wanted to cheat
on her too. So I told her about something that many
people are a shame of even thinking, not even talking.
I told her to masturbate. And I told her that I have done
it and enjoying it. I didn't go through all the details
how and when. I just mentioned that it was a relief.
Just thing of it. You are not really cheating. You are
not endanger yourself with sexual transmitted deceases.
You are simply releasing the pressure that accumulated
in your body, and there's nothing wrong with that.
Decpite the fact that, I realised that she is not a
baby and probably tried it before (if not doing it
already) I continued to talk to her like I was asking
her for a favor.
I told her: you are not pervert, you are not doing
anything wrong. It is natural for human body. Everyone
has done it at least once. And you don't have to admit
about this to anybody, not even me. You can tell me
right now something like "yea, you're crazy", but when
you hang up the phone, you can do whatever you want.
Nobody sees you, not even me.
It seemed like a natural way to fulfill the emptiness,
when you don't want to involve someone else, isn't it?
...Time went by. I comeback to town. I can't tell
whether she followed my recommendations or what. But I
admitted to her that I did it. And it was fine with me.
In order to not to put her "in the spot" I never asked
her whether she had done it, but when I admitted to
her, I noticed that she was kind of excited about this
fact. It was something new to us. We started to joke
about this, and when we had sex one day I told her how
I've done it.
At that time I realized that it will turn me on like
crazy if I would see her masturbating. And there she
was, laying naked near me and wanted to watch me
"working on my own". So I gave her "the show". She saw
me masturbate especially for her. That sight turned her
on up to the craziness, and we had great sex
afterwards, but I remembered that she was turned on by
the sight of me touching myself.
After that she was basically forced me on playing with
myself before we had sex every time. She loved to watch
it, and I got used to it. I didn't mind in doing that.
It was pleasurable for me to see that I do something
that turns really on my lovely girlfriend. It became
kind of usual thing, she used to place her head on my
chest facing my private organs. She used to take my
hand and placed it on my penis, inviting me to touch
myself. I used to masturbate with one hand whlie
caressing her body with the other. And after I feel
that she is exited enough (usually obvious by the
amount of her "fluids"), we ended up with traditional
sex, and everyone was happy.
Again, it was a little later when I realized what I
really enjoyed. Another logical analysis had brought me
up to the speed, what I really did. I was touching
myself, and enjoyed it. Seems like no big deal, after
everything I tried before, but it really was. Since I
am a man, I was touching the male's body and enjoyed it
- yeah, my own. You may ask - so what? Every man has
done it. Most people do it constantly. But, that was a
big deal, because if you look at it the other way, I
wasn't just enjoying because "something" had touched
me. I was touching that "something" with my own hand
and enjoyed it (my penis, that is).
Please read again 2 previous sentences, because they
are very important!
My penis wasn't the only part of my body sensed the
pleasure, it was the arm as well.
That's when I realized that if I would touch someone
else's body I could like it almost the same way. That's
when, for the first time in my life I started of
thinking of touching another man. And it was normal,
because my hands already touched my penis, and I know
how that feels, and if I like it, I may as well like
the touching of another man.
So there I was, for the first time fantasized my being
with other man. But I wasn't a "man enough" to do this
And even that wasn't all.
Let's admit, being a man we at least once had
fantasized how fun would that be with two women at the
same time. There's no guy in the world who would refuse
that (unless you're gay). And it is exciting sight for
many man to see two women enjoying each other. That was
the other drive, when I realized that it could be
enjoyable for my woman to see me with another man. I
was thinking if she would asked me to bring another
girl to bed - what would I feel?
Maybe I am complete idiot and 99% of women wouldn't
find it excited to be with two guys at the same time,
but I decided to gamble.
And I was right. Our conversation had revealed the
interest for my girlfriend to see me with another man.
I really loved her, and it turned me really on, the
fact that I could do something, that will "drive her
crazy" (in a good way). It was very enjoyable for me to
think that I could brought some pleasure to my women by
touching and being with another man. And when I asked
her: Does she wanted to be with two man at the same
time? The answer was obviously yes.
But the primary reason for bringing another man in our
bed, was love to my woman. I thought that it is selfish
to not let your partner to be with another person. If I
really love her, wouldn't I want her to be happy? We
all know that people are different, and being with
different partners may give you a slightly different
experience. And it seemed wrong to me that she would
have to loose that variety experience just because we
are a couple. Yet, jealousy and some of my "macho"
thoughts wouldn't let me receive enjoyment of seeing my
woman with another man.
So, to remove this block, I finally found the solution:
In order to not to get jealous of another man - I have
to learn to enjoy that other man. If I will think of
him as my own toy, then I can't be jealous at all. And
since the durty thought was already in my mind, it was
easy to convince myself to give it a try.
I used to be a jealous type of person, but after that I
saw this as an opportunity to give a new pleasure
experience to my woman. Yes, I can kiss her, I can
touch her and I can have her, but I can also do
something that not a lot of men can do, I can give her
a pleasure of being with another man. And since I am
able to do and arrange that, she was grateful to me for
the pleasure which she never experienced previously.
And that wasn't the fact of being with someone else. It
was a feeling of openness and true love, the love so
strong that will allow her to enjoy pure sex and
nothing else. I didn't shared my love. I loved her and
she really loved me too. I just loved her so much, that
I wanted her to enjoy everything, even another man.
When she understood my philosophy, she started to love
me even more. It was a great experience for both of
That was about 10 years ago. We split for some stupid
reason, which has nothing to do with sex, lust or my
bisexuality, because the sex was always great.
I was so secure in our relationship (and in my self)
that I wasn't afraid that she would like someone else
more than me.
To me, another man was just a sex-toy, which I let my
girl to play with
But, can you love your partner so much that you would
let her or him to be with another person, just for fun?