Best of Craigslist

Best of Craigslist http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/ Best postings from craigslist.org, selected by readers en-us Copyright 2008, craigslist.org webmaster@craigslist.org webmaster@craigslist.org http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/ Best of Craigslist Collection 2008-04-13T14:47:53-04:00 2 daily To the stupid bitches at Walmart that assumed I stole their phone http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/640933911.html You know who you are. You and your skanky friend entered the ladies room at Walmart, apparently looking for a cellphone you lost because you're a moron. I washed my hands, and upon exiting the restroom I said, "Excuse me," since you clearly had no intention of moving your fat ass out of the doorway. I proceeded to look at some shirts in the womens' department, when suddenly you two white trash tramps came RIGHT over and stood oh, maybe, 3 feet away from me, glaring. The porkier one of you two (the one with the mustache) then took out your cellphone and obviously dialed the lost one's number in hopes that suddenly my bag would ring your familiar ringtone- probably Shakira or Lil Kim. I couldn't believe you had the audacity to be such stupid hos. Not only did you make no attempt to be discreet, but you were blatantly rude and insulting. Why the fuck would I want your cellphone? I'm all set with 19yr old punks calling me for blowjobs. I also don't have any interest in receiving phone calls from probation officers or Planned Parenthood. If I did find a cheap-ass phone probably in a pink case, covered in stickers- there's a damn good chance I'd return it to the "Lost And Found," assuming I'd even give a shit enough to do that. I'm sure that's a far-fetched concept to you, considering if it were the other way around, you'd probably pawn a lost phone as fast as you'd jerk off a homeless guy that offered you a cigarette. Next time you immediately jump to conclusions because of your own stupidity, go back and check the aisle with vaginal cream and douches first; you probably left your phone there. You must have found it shortly after, because you were no longer up my ass, skanking up my personal space. Either that, or the dollar store was having one hell of a sale that you couldn't pass up. Screw you both. <ul class="blurbs"> <li> Location: Newport, RI <li> it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests</ul> webmaster@craigslist.org 2008-04-13T14:47:53-04:00 Copyright 2008, craigslist.org http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/640933911.html To the stupid bitches at Walmart that assumed I stole their phone text FREE: Giant Lawn Ornament http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/632786911.html FREE: BACKHOE ATTACHMENT I have 1 free backhoe attachment. Approx wt. 1000-1500lbs. It has been sitting in my yard for the last 4 years. It came from someone else's yard for 8 years prior. Time for it to go. Be the envy of your neighborhood with this in your yard. Put it out on the front lawn, that way everyone will see it. Your neighbors will be envious, and you will be proud. THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF USES FOR THIS ATTACHMENT: Have a neighbor who pisses you off?, Put it on the property boundry, that way he will have to look at this every day. Need a place to tie the dog to for the day? He'll never move this thing. When you have your 4th of July BBQ, This is a great conversation starter. You can brag how you will strip it, paint it, and how well this thing will work after you put all that work into it. A lovely place to hang your tarp! Makes a unique cooler for that 4th of July party or trellis for those rambling briars. Bragging rights - yup, worth mentioning twice. F.A.Q. Q: Can u load this on my trailer? A: No my wife is a wimp. It will have to be partially dismantled. I have a loader that can lift approx 500-700 lbs. Q: Can u hold this for a couple of months till I decide I don't want it? A: NO; 1st person to arrive gets it. Q; Do u think my wife will be pissed if I came home with this? A: No The only thing about this that will upset your wife, is that she did not find it first, that way she could surprise you. Q: Would you be able to deliver this fine piece of equipment? A: SURE; why not, if you like, I can also dismantle it, strip the paint off it, repaint it, lubricate it, deliver it, reassemble it, and make sure it is in fine working condition, all for a GEE, THANKS ALOT MAN. In closing, this is free, you need to move it, it needs alot of work, it does have a value, but not to me. (THIS IS NOT FOR THE FEINT OF HEART, IF YOU ARE NOT SURE ABOUT THIS, NOT SURE IF YOU CAN FIX THIS, OR NOT SURE YOU HAVE THE TIME FOR THIS, DON'T BOTHER) THIS COULD END UP BEING A GIANT LAWN ORNAMENT IN YOUR YARD. We've enjoyed it - now it's your turn. <img src=632786911.1.jpg> <img src=632786911.2.jpg> <img src=632786911.3.jpg> <img src=632786911.4.jpg> <ul class="blurbs"> <li> Location: Foster, RI <li> it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests</ul> webmaster@craigslist.org 2008-04-06T19:59:27-04:00 Copyright 2008, craigslist.org http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/632786911.html FREE: Giant Lawn Ornament text Re: money crazy vets in R.I. http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/197030248.html I would love to see the price list that people would NOT complain about. Clinics pay for supplies, vaccines, meds, good help, insurance, utilities, continuing ed. etc etc ETC. When was the last time you looked at a Webster catalog (one of the primary distribution companies for professional veterinary necessities) to know what supplies alone cost? Are vets supposed to make no profit?..wait lemme guess, "If you REALLY cared about animals..." then no one would be charged for services rendered. The MINUTE that a vet does not offer every option for good care, including elective bloodwork and diagnostics that happen to cost money, then something will be missed and you will be calling your lawyer. People who complain about paying for bloodwork are the FIRST to call a lawyer when their pet dies under anesthesia after they declined proper workup. They are the first to refuse to pay a bill for emergency care (which required expensive shock meds, three techs working two hours overtime and intense professional effort) because the dog ended up dying after being mangled by a car...when they are the one who let him roam into the busy street in front of their house. They are the first to let a chronic underlying problem get way out of hand and then complain about the cost involved then when they could've nipped things in the bud earlier on. My personal favorite is the indignant client who feels ripped off because it's going to cost $400 to unblock and hospitalize their male cat AGAIN after we told them a million times after the last episode to get the cat off goddamn Deli-Cat and Kit N' Kaboodle. But NO, it's our fault and we are trying to screw them out of their hard-earned money which would be better spent at TJ Maxx in their opinion. I have been a vet tech for 15 years and I have yet to know a vet who drives a Mercedes, goes on extravagant vacations, isn't paying on a monsterous student loan for decades after graduation (I know a vet who recently graduated and has a hundred thou of student loans to pay off. GREAT doctor, too.), or who gets manicures and salon cuts. It offends me greatly to see people complain about the cost of vet care. A good clinic does what's right...offers options for diagnosis, preventative care, and the best course of action to assure your pet's ultimate good health and long life. You get what you pay for. People have no issue paying for an exhaust job or transmission work on their car...so how is it that a vet that recommends x-rays for a limp or bloodwork on a geriatric cat is a money-grubbing shyster? I once had an ER nurse call up to ask the price of a spay...it was $210. What is the cost of a human ovariohysterectomy? 100 times that? She was PISSED...thought that was outrageous. WTF? $210 for basically the same level of care as the human...a sterile surgical suite, good instruments that have been sterilized, expensive monitors to keep tabs on the anesthetised animal, several skilled prep and anesthsia techs, a good surgeon, the latest pain meds, recovery nursing... You wouldn't want anything less. You just wouldn't want to pay for it, is all. If you don't want to pay for vet care, then get a hermit crab. I saw there are a couple available here. You can't have it both ways, people... The best, up-to-date, concientious, quality care....but you want it cheap. Having pets is not a basic right. If you can't afford to care for them, don't have them. If you can't afford a car payment, gas, insurance and periodic maintenance and repairs, then you probably wouldn't get a car, right? I am sure that there are vets out there who overcharge. But I have never known one in all these years. They are good at Ferguson, too. Some vets have an especially good ear for murmurs...I am sure she thought she heard one and wanted to give you every opportunity to give the utmost care. If she hadn't offered you that option, you'd probably be pissed, too, if it turned out to be something serious later on. Ass coverage via diagnostics is CRITICAL in medicine, human or veterinary. Especially in this day and age of hair-trigger litigation. The more I work with animals, the more I dislike people. I especially love how anyone that had owned a couple cats in their lifetime knows allllll about cats...even more than those of us who have watched 8 million disease processes and 16 million behavioral problems take place in the same predicatable ways over and over and over and over... what could we possibly know better than your average half-assed pet owner? Just THINK, please...we are all in this field because we care about nothing else as much as pets. That is our primary concern, more than your financial situation...I meet people every day who "can't afford" an annual and a heartworm test but who can apparently afford to smoke Marlboro reds, go tanning, and drive a nicer car than I will EVER have on my vet tech salary. Your vet didn't hold a gun to your head and make you buy a puppy mill Yorkie that (hello, no surprise!...did you research the breed?) fulfilled its inherent predilection for knee issues that require surgery by a board certified orthopedic surgeon. Boo hoo. Because you can't (or don't want to) pay for it, then vets are price gougers? Get a clue, and welcome to my world. I need a beer. Thanks, however, to anyone willing to ponder the other side. PS: Just because a pet "looks fine" does not mean everything is or will remain hunky-dory...it's called "preventative medicine" for a reason. Organs fail and disease happens without any fanfare to announce it right off. You wouldn't cut corners on your kids....feed your kids Doritos and Lucky Charms and then bitch and moan when they get ill or need routine dental work.   <ul style="margin-left:0px; padding-left:3px; list-style:none; font-size: smaller"> <li> this is in or around Here <li> no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests </ul>  webmaster@craigslist.org 2006-08-21T17:03:19-04:00 Copyright 2008, craigslist.org http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/197030248.html Re: money crazy vets in R.I. text SEX WITH RICHARD NIXON... - m4w http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/103388646.html I am a 29 yr old man who for years has been collecting masks of famous past presidents. I have over 40 masks now of our governing forefathers and it is also somewhat of a kink of mine. I am looking for women into roleplay who may have always fantasized about getting banged by a young Richard Nixon.. or perhaps done doggy style by a brash and sexy Abraham Lincoln? How about being tied to my podium and made to "submit" by leather bound and erect Jimmy Carter? The scenarios are endless...and so is my presedential lust....if this sounds like a fantasy you would be excited by...drop me a line...your commander and chief awaits you... webmaster@craigslist.org 2005-10-11T12:31:29-04:00 Copyright 2008, craigslist.org http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/prv/103388646.html SEX WITH RICHARD NIXON... - m4w text