A Turd in the Tub
Being a helpful child, she likes to hand you things. Also, being a female child, she keeps up a steady patter of stream-of-consciousness natter in the background as she does so. Like most parents, I tuned it out and occasionally interjected a mutter of my own. Until...
"Here, Dahdee. This is for you." And she hands me a SLIMY, STICKY, STINKY BROWN TURD.
I promptly threw up un the bathtub.
Which upset my daughter, and pronpted HER to throw up in the bathtub. Leaving my daughter in a tub full of bubbles, toys, turds and puke.
My wife went NUCLEAR. Snatched our daughter out of the tub, ran her into the OTHER bathtroom, and re-bathed her.
Leaving me to deal with scrubbing out the tub and washing shit and puke off of each of the zillion bathtub toys. Gah.