best of craigslist > portland > PJ Stealer!
Originally Posted: 2004-05-13 9:28am

PJ Stealer!

Location: Party in Zig Zag at the end of March.

You: Early 20's snowboarding type girl with dog, stoned and drunk
out of your mind, unable to stand without assistance.

Me : English guy who awoke the following morning to find blue PJ's
missing.

Well you know how it goes you're at a party with a keg, and even though
you're thirty you still drink a bit too much, and the last hours of the
night are a bit on the hazy side.

You can vaguely remember not being very helpful when your girlfriend was
trying to inflate the air-bed. So when you awake in the morning to find
you're not wearing the PJ pants you expected you would be, you wonder
quietly to yourself if you finished the evening with a table dance and
maybe they're hanging from the ceiling fan.

They're not, but when you can't find them in the overnight bag you brought
with you you give up and sleep in the car on the way home. You call your
hosts later that day to thank them for a great party, and to "look out for
a pair of blue pj pants, which you seemed to have misplaced". Your host
comments that they don't remember you doing a table dance, but they'll
check the ceiling fan for you anyway. They go on to explain to their
boyfriend why one their friends is phoning up and asking about bedroom
attire.

Months pass, and with each day it becomes easier to deal with the loss of
a comfy pair of lounge pants.

Then more recently at another party with a subset of people from the kegger you
learn that the drunk, stoned, can't walk, talk or stand girl was so bad
that she crashed on her friend's bed, wet herself whilst sleeping, and left
her soiled jeans in the friends room, leaving in the early hours of the
morning wearing a blue pair of pants.

So the mystery of the missing PJ's is solved. You got so drunk and stoned
you lost control of your bodily functions in someone else's bed, and then
Stole My Pants!

Whilst I wish you hadn't taken them, I understand the predicament you were
in. As much as I'd like to have them back, I think you should keep them.

No hard feelings though, you provided a group of friends with an entertaining
story about a drunk girl no one knew. We all had a good laugh when we
heard about your friend coming back in the early hours of the morning with
another girl, only to find his bed rather wet, thus killing the moment.
I'm sure one day he'll be able to laugh about it too. :-)

Only one question remains unanswered, was I wearing them when you took
them?




post id: 31108465

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