best of craigslist > portland > Allergies- You Win!!
Originally Posted: 2003-06-22 4:22pm

Allergies- You Win!!

This is an open letter to my allergies:
You win. I give in. I give up. I concede that you are great and all-powerful and I am but a speck. You won't let me go outside to water my garden. My tomato plant is dying. I nurtured that plant from a wee, sickly seedling I got for 99 cents at Fred Meyer. You won't let me play with my dogs outside- sorry Belle, sorry Holden, blame Mr.Pollen and Mrs.Grass. I haven't picked up dog poop in two weeks. See, now my neighbors must suffer because of you. I am on my knees, begging you....leave me alone for a day...just one day....I need to water my garden/play with my dogs/weed my garden/get the paper/go shopping/play with my dogs so they stop staring at me with those sad, sad eyes…. I want my neighbors to stop thinking I am an agoraphobic. I think the next time I sneeze, a lung or two may come flying out. I beg of you.....

Oh god, I am rambling on about you, All-Great-and-Knowing Allergies. I fear I may have angered you. I apologize. No, stop, get away!!!!! NO more....ACHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

post id: 12726227

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