Originally Posted: 2005-05-20 4:26pm

what I learned from CL today

1. Saddam has big balls. Actually, we knew that was true ever since we found out he told the United States military to go suck an egg while he didn't have any WMD or any other kind of weapons or shit to back that up with...but now we have undie pics to confirm the facts.

2. The female "organsm" is a myth. However, the female "orgasm" is not, proving once again that it's the really excellent spellers who are good in bed.

3. The Dave Matthews Band is so huge that there is actually a Dave Matthews Tribute Band. Coming next: Dave Matthews Band: The Next Generation, followed by Dave Matthews Band: Voyager, followed by Dave Matthews Tribute Band, Episode III: Revenge of the Sewage.

4. White women smell like wet dogs, which of course means that wet dogs smell like white women. I think this will help me convince my girlfriend to get a dog.

5. NYC R&R is #1 for racist postings. This is a relief, since the Murder Capital title has passed to Baltimore, Boston now also has crazy expensive rents, people are getting randomly shot at in places like Ohio, and the "edgy," popular sitcoms are now set in places like Newport Beach instead of here, so we New Yorkers need something to remind ourselves that we don't just live in a slightly warmer version of Toronto.

6. Osama bin Laden died again today, and will probably die again tomorrow. The fact that he keeps coming back makes me think you don't really get 72 sexy virgins in Paradise like they say, or that bin Laden is gay. Come to think of it, maybe someone should tell Bush that bin Laden might be gay...he'd get interested in dealing with him again in no time.

7. Women sometimes go to bars to have a drink, relax, check out the game, and maybe have a little conversation, just like regular people! That's it, my mind is blown enough for one day.

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