The Amityville Cubicle
The stapler snaps shut everything I say the word EVERMORE. I don't even have to touch it, I just have to say evermore: see.
And my computer mouse has two red unblinking eyes that stare stare stare at me while I'm eating my pretzels and or working on my spreadsheets. Every night I try to put the mouse in the drawer, everyday I come back in and it's back on my desk, those red rheumy eyes peering right through me.
This morning, I came into my cubicle, to find that there's now a trap door now in my floor. White smoke it billowing around it's edges, but no way am I going down there. No friggen way.
The last guy who had this job, that sat in this cubicle, he hung himself from the air vent, and when I look up, I can still see strands of rope he used to tie himself up. Woe is me, oh woe is me.