I walked by you on my way home from work. As soon as you saw me, you proceeded to unzip your pants, pull out your Vienna sausage, and stroke it. You then yelled after me, telling me to bend over.

I am really sorry I ran away horrified. I now realize how sweet it was of you to offer me your little penis so eagerly. You must get a lot of action, you charmer you. Perhaps we can get together for tea and crumpets sometime?