best of craigslist > los angeles > meet my middle finger
Originally Posted: 2004-09-07 8:01pm

meet my middle finger

Say hello to my middle finger.


::|::

Yes. That is my middle finger in keyboard language so deal with it.

I'm a rough bitch who likes my hair pulled and my tampon strings played with. In my spare time I like to design furniture out of empty Crisco cans and make pillows out of my ex boyfriends old jeans. I particularly like the crotch section so I can smell his ol stanky ass while watching Strange Brew and 8 Mile. I smoke stogies like Professor Howell and I talk like a dolphin in 5 different languages. Atlantic dolphins. "AUUUYYYYYYYYY" and the Pacific Dolphins "errrrrrryyyyyyyuuuuu". The asian dolphin.. "chonnnnnnnnnnchiiiiiiiiiiii" and the russian dolphin "missssssssssllllieeeeeee" and the lesbian dolphin "coooooooooooochie"

I decided long ago that I would make things simple for my prospective suitors and if they ever pissed me off, I would flash my fucking large middle finger in their face. It really cuts out all the communication, needy, emotional crap in relationships. Just know, if you get the finger..back off mother f----- or Ill kick you with my stilettos in your sack of dimes.

Dont get me wrong, I like to use my middle finger for nice things as well. Like say for example sticking it up your pie hole. Or hey how about twirling your car keys around it when Im really drunk. Or how about while at a picnic i can screw into a wine bottle cork. I can also wash your car windows with it and just slap that baby on with some soap suds. "Thud" What are you looking at asshole..
You dont need a swiss army knife when i have the middle finger. It gets hard around psychotic hot buttcheeks and emotionally retarded men who cant fucking sit still and fucking cuddle with my fine ass tits. What is wrong with you do you have ADD? eh? ::|:: yeah..that is what i thought.

I broke my middle finger once in my last relationship from what the doctor calls "your using your middle finger too much ..its not meant for all those things"..I say fuck em. It sure works for me. I get all that I want and more. The last dude was like waaaaaaaaa Dont tell me what to do. Im like shut up pussy and bend over and take it like a man.

So what do you say ..lets make a date shall we? Just the three of us?

Come and knock on my door..
Come and knock on my door
Ive been waiting for you
Weve been waiting for you
The finger is hers and hers not his
here to fuck with you...






post id: 41769448

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