I hate this plant but it wont DIE
It lives on my front porch and I keep hoping someone will steal it but so far that has not worked out. Somebody please take this plant. It won't die. My cats won't even chew it. I don't have the heart to throw away a living thing so you need to take it.
It has bright green, elongated heart shaped leaves. The flowers are bright red hearts with red finger-sized furry thing coming out of them. It's not flowering right now but everyone who looks at the flowers says they look somehow phallic or naughty.
Please come take my penis plant.