Originally Posted: 2003-05-21 00:06 (no longer live)
print

My ode to you....

To the jerk who pulled in entirely too close to my car in the parking lot:

The spot was marked "compact", didn't you see?'
It's for Honda Civics and NOT an SUV.
But yours was a hearse of a truck,
and therefore, my car got stuck.

I waited patiently for you to come back,
wanting to tie you down to your own roof rack.
You did not balk, express regret or apologize,
therefore, I don't excuse your truck's inappropriate size.

You only bought one thing, some vaseline in a tube,
You couldn't take a walk with your lover for the lube?
Instead you chose to drive that massive beast of a truck,
and block my car, you damn stupid F*CK!

Next time, I'm putting nails under those big tires,
that belong to SUV truck driving liars,
thinking you belong in a compact parking spot,
people like you should be tied down and shot.
(by a bb or water gun, of course - no hate mail, please,
from my fellow, wonderful craigslist attendees!)

You're polluting the air and wasting gas,
We missed a connection, alright....
MY FOOT TO YOUR ASS!


post id: 11533510