Originally Posted: 2005-05-05 11:01am
Can you handle this?
I really don't think I need to be posting this, but my family thinks I should have a boyfriend and I guess this is in an effort to humor them. I am 5'6, 115lbs, blonde hair, green eyes, tan skin...well you get the picture. Anyway, my life is already full right now, as I work a great office job and my after hour time is completely consumed by my cats. I have thirteen of them and they are my life. That is why I don't think I need a man. I love my cats so much, especially Winky, he's all black except for a white patch over one of his eyes, that's why I call him "Winky".
Obiviously, if you want to be a part of my life, you have to like cats, all the time. I keep the litter boxes clean and all my cats are fixed. They are not noisy and for the most part are people friendly. But they are always watching. Always watching. I close the door when I use the toilet now. Sometimes they speak to me, they think I can't hear them but I can. They are plotting. I know it. Eyes always following me. I don't even get to watch what I want on tv anymore. Wait...Ok, they're gone. Winky is the only one I trust. I've had him the longest and he would never turn on me, at least I don't think so. God bless you Winky. The other twelve are Judases. Sometimes I'm scared to come home, sometimes I'm scared to leave home. I don't feel like it's my home anymore, it belongs to them.
I haven't been with a man biblically so to speak in quite some time. I have toys, but they're mostly cat toys. I am afraid that if they don't like you they may try and do something to you, maybe even try to hurt you, and I couldn't handle that on my conscience. NO DOGS!!! They hate dogs. If they even smell a dog on you, there is no telling what may transpire.
So, I like men that are a few inches taller than me, have a good sense of humor, do not smoke or do drugs, but a little wine is okay every now and again. I don't like men who steal my pills, cause they are for me and only me. Oh God somebody please help me. I can't do this anymore. They tell me they can read my mind, they tell me to watch what I say, but I don't believe them.
P.S. No Fatties!!!