My ass recently stopped to help this one chick's fat ass push her car to the side of the road, while TONS of cars honked, stared, and sped out of the way. I also helped one lady's old ass dig her car out of the snow. My ass does this because I once broke down on Storrow, and nobody stopped to help my cold, stupid ass. I then swore to help everyone's ass who needed it, whether their ass was broken down, shoveling out, or out of gas, I vowed to help their black, Latino, Asian, old, female, fat, white, or ugly asses. Your ass wasn't helped not because it's black, but because of the (VERY New England) cultural problem of fortressing ourselves within our asses' microcosm. I'd also point out to all of your asses, that this cultural characteristic of ours is what largely fuels this portion of Craig's List. Your asses don't talk to one another.
Unfortunately necessary note: The above has nothing to do with asses.